The Repertoire

I blog this dedication to all the anomalies of subsequent unlearnings.

The backdrop is life again, for what else is there to understand than the very existence of presence... presence of existence.

No matter how well I understand this everyday struggle to unification with the multitude forces that seem to be influencing my way of life, decision making abilities, 5 sensular affections, multi dimensional chaos and it's order, all the visible indicators of absolute anarchy so much in tune to distract you from your day to day emancipation. The sheer game of life at it's synchrony with one's worst nightmares...lol...and i haven't even taken life as it comes, for now , that sure needs some determination and single spirit vision. No, i am not talking about MPD's or spontaneous combustions yet....just plain simple single spirit wanting moi.

Make a wish...but beware what you wish for, for lately the chain of coincidences have a total control over my understanding. Or rather, my understandings of anything standing...incessantly relating to the sub-conscious chain...the chain within the chain...the understanding within the understanding...a perception within another perception...a point in a point...a little bit of this..and a little bit of that...all seem to be tearing my mind in such blissful fashion of an in depth dive, that now i just want to rest in the static/kinetic divide.

How do i conjure this pleasant gift without being gifted....how do i work up to be gifted...or maybe i just need inspiration to define the understanding which is already on it's way...how can i complete something that i have started, still not knowing if it is started after all...

the perception is edgy, the perception is quick, the smouldering is so irresistible, so ravenous...that today's emancipation may have no way out but to burn...burn every day, and there is nothing left of me...so much to a clear understanding of my stand on life and it's multi-stimulatory design...for the first time i want to run...run straight into the core...a dash...that may just not be a - up to liberation...it may just become the big ------- to liberation.

With so many gaps yet left unfilled, the process is leading up to me as if it were to reveal to me the divides from the divide not's, the visionary from the multi-visionary...perceptive off course, the strides to the multiple strides...to the fill in the voids, to the non-voids, the sensational marquee full of colours, the colours scintillating to the sound of the inner divine...the dance...i(r)onic...for the next moment, there is no space left for Irony...the spaces are to befitting and self centric to it's very nature of being...

I need a walk to be able to run again...need to run to be able to dash again...need to dash to be able to crash again...to crash to be able to get up again...to get up again..never to look back ever on the myriad benevolence that pushed me away from itself for a wild crash into the seemingly unknown.

Now i hold no fear to falling...hold nothing dear that keeps calling...if there is absolutely nothing that i have learnt from my past, it is because i have learned what i wish to keep Dear and Unlearned the rest.